This page includes gentle support for hard moments, and practical help for getting through the day. You can start anywhere.

“There is no right way to grieve—only your way.”

GENTLE ACTIVITIES THAT MAY HELP

These are gentle, trauma-informed activities for parents grieving the loss of a child. These are not tasks to complete or goals to reach. They are invitations to support survival, expression, connection, and meaning—at your own pace. Take what helps. Leave the rest.

Early Days – Shock & Survival

·       Light a candle for your child.

·       Write or speak your child’s name.

·       Wrap yourself in something comforting.

·       Sit quietly with your grief for a few minutes.

·       Slow your breathing (inhale 4, exhale 6).

·       Drink something warm with intention.

·       Allow yourself to rest without productivity.

Expressive Activities

·       Write letters to your child.

·       Journal freely without editing.

·       Draw or paint emotions.

·       Create a memory box or scrapbook.

·       Tell your child’s story.

·       Cry, yell, or release emotion safely.

·       Use voice notes when writing is hard.

Body-Based Support

·       Walk slowly outdoors.

·       Stretch gently.

·       Rock or sway to self-soothe.

·       Take long showers or baths.

·       Place a hand on your chest and breathe.

·       Rest without sleeping.

·       Use grounding techniques.

Connection & Support

·       Sit in silence with someone safe.

·       Attend a peer support group.

·       Text someone who understands.

·       Ask for help with tasks.

·       Set boundaries around unhelpful people.

·       Let others witness your pain.

Rituals & Meaning

·       Create a daily or weekly ritual.

·       Honor birthdays and anniversaries.

·       Plant a tree or garden.

·       Release letters or symbolic items.

·       Wear remembrance jewelry.

·       Speak your child’s name aloud.

Long-Term Integration

·       Carry your child’s story forward.

·       Advocate or volunteer when ready.

·       Create legacy projects.

·       Allow joy without guilt.

·       Redefine hope.

·       Honor who you are becoming.

What Helps When…

Grief changes from moment to moment. This section offers ideas based on common grief experiences. You do not need to try everything. Choose what feels tolerable right now.

When You Feel Numb

·       Sit quietly with a warm drink.

·       Wrap yourself in a blanket.

·       Listen to gentle music.

·       Name one thing you can feel.

When You Feel Overwhelmed

·       Breathe slowly.

·       Limit decisions.

·       Ask someone to sit with you.

·       Ground yourself using your senses.

When You Feel Angry

·       Write without censoring.

·       Walk briskly.

·       Hit a pillow.

·       Name the anger aloud.

When Guilt Shows Up

·       Write down what you wish had been different.

·       Talk with another bereaved parent.

·       Remind yourself you loved deeply.

·       Practice self-compassion.

On Anniversaries or Birthdays

·       Create intentional rituals.

·       Take the day off if possible.

·       Honor your child in a personal way.

·       Lower expectations.

SUPPORT FOR DAILY NEEDS

Practical, compassionate ideas for coping with the loss of your child. These are not rules or expectations—they are gentle suggestions meant to help you get through difficult days. Use what helps. Leave the rest

Meal Planning

·       Aim for being fed, not eating perfectly.

·       Eat the same simple meals each day if it reduces decisions.

·       Use frozen or ready-made meals without guilt.

·       Ask for specific meal help from others.

·       Use paper plates or disposable items to reduce cleanup.

·       Set reminders to eat or drink.

·       Keep no-cook snacks within reach.

·       Hydration matters even when food feels hard.

How to Ask for Support

·       Choose one trusted person to communicate needs for you.

·       Use short texts or copy/paste messages.

·       Accept help even if it isn’t perfect.

·       Say clearly when you don’t want advice.

·       Allow quiet company without conversation.

When You Just Don’t Know

·       Ask for help by category (food, errands, company).

·       Request short, time-limited help.

·       Ask someone to sit with you.

·       Ask someone to help you decide what might help.

Breathing Techniques

·       Inhale for 4 counts, exhale for 6 counts.

·       Place one hand on your chest and one on your belly.

·       Name what you are feeling, then breathe.

·       Use temperature (warm mug or cool water) to reset.

·       Try box breathing if helpful.

Sleep & Rest

·       Rest without sleeping still counts.

·       Create a simple nighttime routine.

·       Nap without guilt.

·       Listen to calming voices, audio books, meditation or sleep hypnosis

(we liked Joe Treacy guided meditations/sleep hypnosis)

·       Get daylight exposure when possible.

When Everything Feels Heavy

·       Create a bare-minimum daily list.

·       Choose one small task per day.

·       Use reminders for basic needs.

·       Let non-essential tasks go.

·       Wear soft, comfortable clothing.

Emotional Coping

·       Say your child’s name aloud.

·       Write freely without editing.

·       Cry when it comes; don’t force it.

·       Allow moments of laughter.

·       Limit contact with people who minimize your grief.

Simple Rituals

·       Light a candle regularly.

·       Hold an object that connects you to your child.

·       Step outside and breathe for one minute.

·       Speak to your child silently or aloud.

·       Mark important dates intentionally.

Healthy Boundaries

·       Decline invitations without explanation.

·       Ask people not to compare losses.

·       Mute social media when needed.

·       Say you will reach out when ready.

You do not need to comfort others about your loss.

“You don’t have to do this perfectly. You only have to keep showing yourself a little kindness, one moment at a time.”